Hard To Stay Read online

  She glanced around the busy street then tilted her head to the side. “That’s awfully nice of you.” Even though she looked amazing, I couldn’t help but notice the dark circles underneath her eyes. It appeared that I wasn’t the only one who had trouble sleeping last night.

  “No biggie.” I played it off like it was nothing. “Black, or cream and sugar?” I asked holding out both cups of coffee.

  She stared at my outreached hands. “Either is fine.”

  I angled my head at her. “Lexi, how do you take your coffee?”

  “Cream and sugar usually, but I’m not picky. I can drink it black. You pick.” She answered sheepishly.

  This girl was going to kill me with kindness. If she got any sweeter, I might have to go on a diet. She was so nonchalant; I wasn’t sure how to act around her. The woman fascinated me on so many different levels. So much for trying to keep things professional between us.

  I stepped into her, getting a whiff of her floral perfume and handed her the coffee. “Here you go, cream and sugar.”

  “You’re sure?” She asked before taking it.

  “Positive,” I said, placing the cup in her hands. As soon as our fingers lightly brushed up against each other, I felt a zap zip through my system causing my thoughts to stall in my head. I decided to chalk up this strange sense of awareness to her beauty, and to my lack of sleep last night.

  “Thank you. I really needed this.” She said blowing into her hot cup before she took a sip. “I have to admit, I was relieved to find you standing outside waiting for me, instead of Colton.” She glanced around before turning her gaze back to me. “I don’t think he knows where I live yet.”

  I silently thought that was a bit naïve on her part, given what we already knew about him. But I decided to keep that thought to myself.

  “How did he find you last night? You think he followed you from work yesterday?”

  My jaw clenched with frustration just thinking about it.

  “It’s the only thing that makes sense. I’ve been very careful since I came to NY. I pay my rent with cash every month, figuring it would be harder for him to track me down that way. Unfortunately, I had to give my employer my social security number. Nothing I could really do about that.” She shrugged while I tried to ignore the feelings stirring inside me. He sounded like a real piece of work.

  As we made our way through the streets of Manhattan, I tried to convince myself that I was only doing my job.

  “Listen, I called a friend of mine this morning. His name is Brett Sawyer. I told him you would be getting in touch with him in regards to obtaining a restraining order.”

  Lexi stopped immediately and looked at me. “Do you really think that will stop him?”

  I tried not to appear irritated by her comment. “Probably not, but at least it’s documented and allows us to act legally next time.” I answered her, truthfully. We both knew that a restraining order wasn’t going to do shit with keeping him away from her. But it was a step in the right direction.

  Sighing loudly, she resumed walking. “I just hate thinking I’m wasting your time. You’ve gone to so much trouble already to help someone you just met.”

  “Stop!” My response startled her. I was irritated thinking that she wasn’t comfortable with me helping her. “First, you’re not wasting my time. Second, I want to help. You have nothing to feel guilty about. You have my word, I’ll do whatever I can to get him to back off and leave you alone.”

  She continued to stare at me. “Why do you care so much?”

  She had a point. Why did I care so much? I tore my eyes away from her hoping she couldn’t see the truth in them. “Call it an occupational hazard. It’s in my blood.” I told her in a half-truth. I couldn’t tell her the other half was simply because I was too drawn to her and unable to stay away.

  “I’m sorry, I’m not trying to sound ungrateful. I’m just not used to trusting people, and for some reason I already trust you.”

  I struggled with the bullshit thought that this was just about me helping someone who needed it. I could only imagine what it took for her to trust someone. Her words had my chest expanding with warmth. I’d gone a long time without feeling anything for another woman, but something inside of me had woken up and forced me to take notice. It was freaking me out.

  I tried to focus on what she had just said and tried to shut down any more unwelcome thoughts. “I don’t take that comment lightly. You have my word, I’ll do whatever I can to protect you.”

  “You’re a good man, Brad Morgan.” She cracked a smile then blew into her hot coffee before bringing it to her lips again.

  My phone buzzed in my pocket. I pulled it out to see Samantha’s name across the screen. I groaned, hit decline then shoved it back in my pants pocket. She apparently was not getting the hint that we were over.

  Lexi crinkled her nose. “Everything okay?”

  I took a sip of my coffee. “Yep.”

  She didn’t look convinced. Her eyes moved from my left hand to my face. “I don’t see a ring, so I’m assuming that was your girlfriend?”

  Was she digging because she was interested or just curious?

  “I don’t have a girlfriend.” I said looking around. I was suddenly aware of my surroundings, realizing that we were only a couple blocks away from her office. The streets were packed with people, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that we were being watched. It was a rapid reminder of how vulnerable she was. My defenses went on high alert. I trusted my instincts more than I trusted her ex, and I was sure he was in the crowd somewhere watching us.

  “Do you mind if I ask why?”

  My head snapped to hers as we crossed the intersection. “Why what?”

  She looked at me with curiosity. “Why you don’t have a girlfriend?”

  I stopped once we hit the curb and turned to face her. “Am I supposed to have one?”

  “I don’t understand how you don’t. I keep looking at you trying to find something wrong with you and I can’t seem to find anything. I don’t understand how you could still be single. I would have thought someone would have snatched you up by now.” She looked down at the ground seemingly embarrassed. “I’m sorry, that was inappropriate.”

  My heart sped up. Was she flirting with me? I pushed that thought aside and answered her even though the topic made me uncomfortable. “I was in a long-term relationship last year that didn’t end well.” Without going into too much detail I added, “besides, my work takes up a lot of my time. If it happens, it happens, but I’m not looking for anything right now.” I hoped that she didn’t notice the waver in my voice. She seemed to be staring at the couple walking hand in hand in front of us.

  She looked up into my face and smiled. “I know we haven’t known each other very long, but I know enough to tell that you’d be one helluva catch for somebody. I hope you find that someone special really soon.”

  I shrugged my shoulders, trying to act like her comment was no big deal. When in fact, I wanted to tell her that she had the potential to be that someone special.

  I let that thought pass and quickly changed the subject. “So,” I said taking a sip of my coffee. “I know you work with Abby at the modeling agency, but what exactly do you do?”

  “I’m a personal assistant to five male models.” That caused me to spit my coffee out and bark out a laugh.

  “You’re shitting me?” I laughed, while wiping the dripping coffee off my chin.

  “Nope.” Her response was quick and unflappable. She tried to cover up her smile, but I caught it just in time. She enjoyed my reaction.

  “So, what does being a personal assistant to five male models entail?” I asked trying not to laugh again.

  She raised her eyebrows, trying to be intimidating. She really enjoyed teasing me. “I schedule their photo shoots, arrange meetings with clothing designers and fragrance manufacturers, make sure all their female fans don’t stalk the lobby of our building. Sometimes I even pick out the underwear they pose in.�
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  I was tempted to take the bait and make a smart-ass remark, but remained quiet when we reached her office.

  Unfortunately, she could see right through my shit-eating grin. “Not everyone can be the shining knight on the white horse and go out and save the world everyday. Everybody has different talents, how boring would life be if we were all the same?”

  Well, shit! She had me there. “Sorry,” I tried to explain. “I wasn’t trying to demean what they do, but I couldn’t imagine relying on my looks to pay the bills and have some attractive female pick out my underwear.” Unless she was planning on taking them off, I wanted to say, but stopped myself.

  She shot me an evil look that had me swallowing back my words. I was relieved to see a trace of humor jump in her eyes. “That’s because you’re very manly.”

  “Thanks… I think?” I replied, feeling unsure if that was a compliment or not.

  She took a sip of her coffee and smirked. “And very opinionated.”

  My mouth slacked open and a smile broke across her face. “If you ever get the urge to switch things up, I could set something up for you.” I swear she was provoking me on purpose. “But don’t let this go to your head...” she said, eyeing me up and down. “You’re a little short, but you definitely have potential.”

  I laughed off her comment, not liking how her gaze made me feel. I knew we were joking, but I was afraid if she stared long enough, she would start to see things I wasn’t ready for her to see. “No thanks, sweetheart. I think I’ll stick to my day job where I get to wear pants.”

  “Okay,” her smile challenged me. “Suit yourself. If you ever change your mind...”

  “I won’t.” I cut her off looking over my shoulder and taking in our surroundings. I lifted my chin. “Listen, as much as I’m enjoying this conversation, you need to get to work and,” I glanced at my watch, “I’m running late. I’ll text you Sawyer’s number, he’s expecting your call.”

  She straightened her shoulders, and I immediately noticed the change in her tone. “I promise I’ll call him today.”

  I threw her my best 500 megawatt smile, hoping it would put her at ease. “Good.” I said awkwardly, not wanting this conversation to end.

  She took a step towards me and completely surprised me when she planted a feather- light kiss on my cheek. “Thanks for going out of your way. I’m really glad I met you. I could use more friends like you.”

  Friend? Are you fucking kidding me? She just drop-kicked me into the friend zone.

  I let her words linger, not liking them at all.

  Masking my disappointment, I gave her a half smile. “I’m glad I was able to help.” I glanced at my watch again. “Shit, I really need to go. Don’t forget to call Sawyer.” I started walking backwards calling out. “What time do you get off?”

  She paused for a moment as if she was thinking it over. “Six o’clock.” she confirmed, even though I already knew the answer. I had sent Abby a text last night asking for her work schedule.

  I wanted to reach out and give her some kind of touch to reassure her that she would be okay, but my hands were too damned clammy and I didn’t want her to notice how nervous I was around her. So I played it cool. “Good, I’ll be here waiting when you get out.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “Positive. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got to run.”

  “See you later.” She smiled, waving playfully over her shoulder as she walked through the revolving door. I stood there like an idiot watching her blue cotton sundress float in the morning breeze, checking out what appeared to be a perfect ass.

  “I can’t wait.” I said, realizing I was totally screwed.

  Chapter Five

  Lexi

  I tried to focus on the notes scattered in front of me, but my mind kept drifting back to my morning walk with Brad. I nervously tapped my pencil against my forehead trying to ignore the undeniable chemistry that existed between us.

  My eyes dropped to my mobile phone to see the text he had sent earlier. Even my pathetic little heart skipped a beat when I read his name on the screen.

  Brad: Call Brett Sawyer, he’s a friend so don’t be nervous. He’ll take good care of you. And if he doesn’t, you let me know so I can kick his ass.

  My finger hovered over the number as I contemplated if I was really ready to open up this can of worms. I was seriously questioning on whether or not this was a good idea. Realizing that this decision wasn’t going to get any easier, I sucked in a breath and dialed the digits.

  After four rings I was caught off guard by the gruff greeting. “Detective Brett Sawyer.”

  “Uhh… hello, this is Lexi Manning. I’m a friend of Brad’s… er, I mean Detective Morgan.” My fingertips gripped tightly onto the fabric of my dress as I fumbled with my words. Smooth Lexi, smooth.

  Detective Sawyer chuckled at the apparent unease present in my voice. “Well, hello Miss Manning. Brad, uhh, I mean Detective Morgan told me to expect your call. How can I help you?”

  Judging by his playful demeanor it was easy to see how these two men could be friends. “I guess I need to obtain a restraining order against my ex.” I explained, getting straight to the point. I purposely left off the embarrassing detail that I had almost married the son of a bitch.

  “Hold on a sec, let me grab my notebook and a pen.” I could hear the squeaking wheel of his chair as it slid across the floor and a desk drawer being slammed shut. My mind started to race as the gravity of the situation started to weigh on my conscience.

  As I started to roll through the details as best as I could, I swallowed hard carefully selecting details and descriptions that I thought would be useful. I was struck with a brief moment of regret. Digging this all up had me feeling more frustrated than ever. I was silently wondering if this conversation was actually helping or hurting matters. I just prayed whatever information I gave would be enough and that it didn’t come back to bite me in the ass.

  There was a long pause from Detective Sawyer once I finished.

  “Look Lexi, before I have you go to the trouble of filling out all the paperwork, I have a very important question to ask you.”

  “Okay.” I said tentatively, unease growing in my voice.

  “I believe every word you just told me so far, but I need to know if you have any formal or supporting documentation that corroborates your story? Do you have any recorded voice messages, copies of threatening texts, emails, or notes left by Colton?”

  His voice came out loud and clear and I suddenly wished I could say I didn’t hear him. I didn’t want to tell him that I was an idiot, because, of course, there was no proof. Whatever hope I’d been feeling was quickly escaping like the air from a punctured tire.

  “No. Unfortunately, I don’t.” In a feeble attempt to rationalize I started to explain. “It wasn’t for lack of trying though. There were a few small attempts, but once they learned who I was accusing, their willingness to help just seemed to evaporate.”

  Hot tears stung my eyes. There wasn’t a judge in the state of Georgia who would come to my aid. Hell, even my own family had chosen Colton over me. When I couldn’t convince my own parents to help me I knew the only other option was to leave and never look back. So here I was…

  “I see.” He sighed, and I felt my optimism start to fade real quick. “Look, Lexi, I’m going to be honest with you. I can get you an appointment to appear in front of a judge, but you’ll have to give one hell of a compelling argument. Most judges won’t want to issue a restraining order unless you have some type of documented proof. It’s possible that they might consider the circumstances around you leaving Atlanta, but there are no guarantees. I’m sorry, I wish I could give you better news.” He must have heard my quick intake of breath because he quickly added. “I said it would be difficult, but not impossible. You’re already taking the first step by creating a paper trail. I can get the ball rolling and see how it plays out.”

  Deep down I knew this was coming. No matter how much
I prayed that there would be a different outcome it never really mattered in the end. Colton always won.

  “That’s okay, I expected as much. Thank you for your time.”

  I set my phone down and blew out a deep breath. The clock on my computer screen told me there was still six hours left to my workday and not a damned thing I could do about it. I dropped my head in my hands with the feeling of defeat weighing me down.

  I forced my way through the messages in my Inbox and returned a few calls and managed to make it to my lunch hour. I stumbled into the break room and opened the fridge. My nose was immediately assaulted by the smell of an open bowl of tuna fish salad. I grabbed my lunch bag and started to unwrap my turkey sandwich. I pulled out my carrot sticks and dip, leaned back in the uncomfortable metal chair and stared at my lunch. It was about as exciting as my mood right now.

  “Hey. Buck up, little camper.” Abby greeted me with a smile, sliding into the seat across from me. When I didn’t respond, her eyebrows raised in question. “Bad day?”

  “If you mean by bad day, that I basically have a snowball’s chance in hell of getting a restraining order against Colton then, yes it’s a very bad day.” She sat there hanging on every word as I told her the details of my conversation with Detective Sawyer.

  Abby leaned back into her chair with a frown. “That sucks!” She opened her mouth to say something, but I stopped her.

  “I was expecting it really, I should be used to it by now.” I admitted, as I picked up my sandwich knowing that I had to put something in my stomach. I pushed down a bite even though food was the last thing on my mind.

  “Still, it doesn’t make it right.” She moved her salad around with her fork looking like she had something on her mind. She looked up at me then started chewing on her bottom lip. “You could look at the bright side.”

  “Bright side? Do tell.”

  She looked directly at me pursing her lips together. “Yeah, you and Brad.”

  Her statement caught me off guard. I thought for a moment that I might actually choke on my sandwich. I quickly wiped my face off with my napkin, eager to set the record straight. “He’s a really nice guy, but we’re just friends.”